
ASSESSMENT AND SUPPORT
Describing a setting in vivid detail
Assessment Criteria and What A Good One Looks Like
Below you will find the Skill Check assessment criteria for this skill, and underneath you will find an example of what a good one looks like, with a brief explanation of how it fits the criteria.
Assessment Criteria for Describing a setting in vivid detail
minus
any of these things
Very little written
Very poor written expression, with too many mistakes
Does not describe the setting
Does not provide any vivid details
equals (just) to plus (secure)
all of these things
Reasonable written expression and accuracy
Describes the setting competently, including establishing where we are
Provides at least one vivid detail in the description
star
all of these things
All the = criteria
General writing style is effective
Creates an appropriate mood
Provides several vivid details to create a clear picture of the scene (e.g. something a person could at least vaguely draw as an image).
What a good one looks like
Example task
Read the passage below and then complete the task underneath.
When Yewande reached the entrance to the park, Candice wasn’t there. Shielding her eyes from the rising sun, she scanned the area to see if she could see her. The park was full of people but Candice wasn’t among them. Where could she be?
Rewrite this so that it includes a vivid description of the setting. Bring the setting to life in your description, while keeping the plot/characters the same.
Example response
When Yewande reached the entrance to the park, Candice wasn’t there. Shielding her eyes from the rising sun, she scanned the area to see if she could see her. To the right of the path, there was a small group of primary school children holding hands and skipping round in a circle, singing some kind of child’s song. Yewande scoffed; it was somehow both sickening and sinister at the same time. She looked left, then, past a forlorn looking playground area, empty and rusting, to a group of teenagers, who were lounging on the grass, surrounded by fast-food detritus, and laughing occasionally as they looked at their phones. Candice wasn’t among them. Where could she be?
Notes on this response
It’s not particularly long — there are only 4 extra sentences, though some of them are quite long sentences, as is normal for description.
The plot and the characters are the same as in the task.
The start and the end are exactly the same as in the task — these parts didn’t need to change.
It does not just add lots of adjectives to the words in the task: it provides vivid details to create a clear picture of the setting. It’s a setting that could be sketched out in a drawing.
The description creates a mood to match the situation (it’s a bit bleak and miserable — even the singing children are described as “sickening and sinister”).
The writing style is effective, with varied sentence structures and some ambitious vocabulary (e.g. forlorn, detritus).